As a life purpose coach, I notice the choices I make between movement and stillness with my clients. My mission is about aligning actions to purpose. Traditionally, coaches in the U.S. have been known to help people become go-getters, achieve their goals, manage time, become more marketable. Although these elements can be essential in a capitalist economy and in life in general, there are other elements that might be even more critical to an individual at a certain point in life. I cannot express how many clients have come to see me who are totally exhausted from overachieving, spinning their wheels, or just treading water but overdrawing on their energy reserves. They can convey what is wrong, but admit their default approach of DOing only exhausts them further. Sometimes the approach and attitude are so out of whack they know they need an outside perspective. That’s where I come in. And believe me, it’s often more challenging to propose stillness than to propose another route of movement. Stillness is edgy–just ask anyone who has tried meditation for the first time!

In the past I’ve been really good at planting a lot of seeds and moving growth, making big things happen; but the question comes, when is stillness important? In permaculture we learn how food forests take years to develop, while garden soil turned over year after year with new seeds planted can move quite quickly toward growth. Meanwhile, every year, I’m back to the drawing board in my garden, adding nutrients and compost to the soil and planting newly bought seeds and watering and weeding. My energy investment only lasts one year. In permaculture, on the other hand, I might adjust the slope of the earth a bit to encourage rain to come toward my food forest, but once I’ve introduced plants there is not much more to do than just LET IT ALL BE, and things move at their own natural pace. My energy investment can last decades.

So the question is, When to move (and how), and when to be still? And how do we know? There are many signs. If you’ve been stagnated a long time but remain in denial, trying to wiggle your way into momentum, try going deeper into the stagnation, get to know it, give it permission to empty, and notice the core feelings behind the triggers or judgements you feel when you’re life doesn’t seem to be going anywhere. (see John Ruskan’s book Emotional Clearing for more information–I’m no therapist, but I reference his book often!). Similarly, if you feel like you’re spinning your wheels, falling down a lot, dropping, or spilling things, you could benefit from even a few moments of stillness. Falling down is the Earth’s invitation to be present with the ground, to get more grounded.

I once asked my dear friend and guide, How do I know when I can really take off? And do you know what he said? “When you feel support all around you, then you know you can take off.” To be sure, the amount of support that is felt directly determines how high you can fly, how much to move or take action.

Consider the following practice–add more stillness with what isn’t working and move with what is.

Enjoy.

Susan

Courting Your Inner Partner –

A Women’s Juicy Afternoon Retreat

Saturday, April 9^th 2-6pm

This retreat is for:

• women strengthening their ability for self-care
• single women manifesting the ideal partner
• women who think (or dream) self-discipline can be sexy
• women in relationship desiring to show up fully
• women in relationship fulfilling their needs
• women getting juicy with self-adoration!

Where: Denver

Cost: Pay-what-you-want (suggested $40-75)

REGISTRATION FOR THIS EVENT IS NOW CLOSED.

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Women gather in The Loft at People House, 2009 Women's Retreat in the City

Take time for YOU in a safe, heartful, and resource-rich space to get what you need from a retreat. Return from chaos into balance, let go of certain elements in your life that hold you back, court your essential self, mark a passage in your life, cry & laugh (even at the same time…), bring juice and vitality to a new area in your life, rejoice in a supportive group of women from many different backgrounds.

Susan provides an amazingly soft, centered, and safe container through which you can get whatever you need from your retreat, introducing activities that will help guide you through your inner exploration with support, in addition to coaching on how to incorporate from retreat into ‘real life’. Equal parts personal and group introspection and reflection time.

WHEN: Friday, November 19th 7-10pm & Saturday, November 20th 10am-4pm

WHERE: The Loft at People House, 3035 W. 25th Avenue, Denver, CO

COST: $111 Postmarked through 10/28. $131 after 10/28. Checks payable to Living Laundry, 3349 Elizabeth St., Denver, CO 80205. Email Susan@livinglaundry.org to hold your spot. Registration deadline 11/11.

Women’s Retreat In The City: Take Time Away When You Can’t Get Away

Sign up now for the next retreat in the city! We’ll cover the following topics: getting what you need from a retreat; gathering the whole self; grieving what needs to go; courting the “self” partner; life/work art project w/ special guest art therapist Beth Erlander; getting juicy; and building an ongoing retreat practice.

When: Friday 11/13, 7–9 pm; Saturday 11/14, 10 am–4 pm

Where: People House, 3030 W 25th Avenue, Denver, CO (map)

Cost: $119 (postmarked by 10/23), $134 (postmarked after 10/23). Mail checks payable to Susan Coates at 3349 Elizabeth St., Denver, CO 80205.

Susan Coates
A Global Career Development Facilitator-certified life/work coach (GCDF), Susan Coates offers facilitated guidance on your journey to passion-path discovery, as well as on-the-ground planning that connects vision to venue, dream to daily life, and hope to happening. Susan has worked for over 10 years with individuals on their professional development needs—from the most difficult-to-serve populationsin Colorado to Denver mayoral appointees.

Beth Erlander
Beth Erlander is a Registered Art Therapist and Licensed Professional Counselor; she received her training from the Naropa University in 2000. Beth currently has a private practice in Arvada and counsels and teaches adolescents at an alternative school in Denver. She has created an art therapy based arts curriculum where the focus is placed on the process AND the product of making art. She firmly believes that art provides deep wisdom regarding life issues and for this workshop she will be providing an art based experience to know what’s next in one’s life/career.